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June 02, 2011

Secrets

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The other day I sat on the bed sorting through a mountain of laundry, Mads jumping crazy, spinning circles around the piles. Finally she collapsed, her cheeks rosy and hair damp with sweat.

“I have a secret,” she told me, out of the blue.
“You do? What is it?” I asked, trying to sound casual, trying not to beg her to spill it, to tell me.  
“I can’t tell you… it’s a secret,” she said, drawing the last word out as though I might not know what it means.
“Oh,” I said. “Okay. You don’t have to tell me.”  

I folded a few more tiny T-shirts, everything pink and spattered with glitter.

“Is it your secret or did somebody else tell it you?” I asked her, not quite ready to let it go.
“It’s mine.”
“Well, if it’s your secret then you can tell me if you want to,” I reasoned. “It’s up to you.”

She fixed her eyes on me for several seconds, trying to decide if I was worthy of it.

“Okay, I can tell you,” she finally announced.

She scooted over next to me, half on my lap as she leaned her head against mine, her mouth against my ear, her arm wrapped around the back of my neck. Even though we were the only ones home she whispered it, her tiny secret, to me in a quiet, hushed voice.

Honestly, I can’t really recall exactly what she said – and of course I wouldn’t tell you anyways. It went on for a while, going off track, up, down and sideways, the way tales usually do when they’re told by a preschooler. But the moment wasn’t lost on me. My little girl, with one tiny foot dipped in the big, wide world, sharing stories that are all her own.

One day I know she’ll have secrets that she won’t want to tell me. But not yet.

June 2, 2011 | Permalink

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Comments

o'shae & jj too, can't quite keep secrets, & they always tell me what they are...& i love that they do!! i hope it doesn't change for a long..long...long time!

Posted by: brandee | Jun 2, 2011 11:20:35 PM

This is so sweet. I can't wait until my little girl is prattling her sweet little secrets into my ear. But for now she is just ten months old and smiling at me. :)

Posted by: Rosalie | Jun 17, 2011 5:50:47 PM

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