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July 10, 2010

You've got to be kidding me...

I feel like I need to record this moment in time for prosperity: Today was, officially, the most hellish day so far in my life as a mom-of-two. F has both girls outside at the moment and with the benefit of a tiny bit of hindsight and a huge glass of wine, I can almost see the humour in it all. Note the 'almost.'

The books reassure me that newborn crying peaks at 6 weeks, but apparently A. missed the memo because she is now 9 weeks and seems to be crying more and more all the time. And on top of that she's getting harder and harder to calm. Inconsolable is probably the word that best describes her - well, both of us, really.

So this morning, after a quick trip to the Farmer's Market, the three of us headed to a nearby park so that Mads could expend her pent-up energy on something other than treating me as a human jungle gym. A. has never been a fan of the carseat, but in the past few weeks she's really devoted herself to loathing it. So we're in the car for all of 30 seconds before she starts shrieking. It's bad enough from the front seat, but poor Mads is about 8 inches away from the constant wailing. Her solution? She decides to drown out her baby sister, shouting out every preschool song she's ever learned at the top of her lungs. Meanwhile I'm attempting to drive while wondering if jumping from a moving vehicle could possibly hurt more than this.

When we finally get to the playground I stick a bottle in A's mouth as Mads makes a beeline for the waterpark - in her shorts and T-shirt. No problem. An hour later, we all head back to the car, where Mads gets into a little panic attack about wearing her soaking shorts in the carseat. So I take them off and load her in. A, of course, has already started her ear-piercing wails.

We make a quick pit-stop along the way so that my mom, who is with us, can quickly pick up something from the produce store. While we wait, I get A. out of the car so that passerby don't start thinking that somebody has shot her. Mads comes along  - "When can we go hoooome?" - and the three of us find a tiny sliver of shade beside a "new age" store, where A. continues her incessant screaming as I jiggle, rock and plead with her.

Enter the store owner, poking her head outside the back door: "She's overheating! Poor baby!"

Me, jiggling: "Oh, she's just tired" (after all, she'd been crying her f'ing head off in the AIR CONDITIONED car).

New Age: "She's just too hot, poor little thing. I have a 1-year-old."

Me (crying openly now): "Thanks, we're okay."

So New Age goes back inside, where she none-too-discreetly peels back the curtain of the back window and stares at us.

Me: "Where the f. is grandma??!"

Mads: "Why did you say that?"


Me: "Nothing, sorry Mads. Okay, let's go see where Grandma is."

So the three of us - A. wailing, me still semi-crying, Mads still wearing only her panties and a T-shirt, which I only realized later - head through the store and then out onto the street in search of grandma. 

Anyways, very long story only sort of long:: We're all back home, all alive and only one of us is still crying. I'll leave you to make your best guess as to who it is. 

Serenity now. Holy hell, this is hard.

July 10, 2010 | Permalink


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First, let me congratulate you on A's birth. She's gorgeous. I was reading your blog over at Babycenter and was curious about the baby. She's really lovely.

As a mum of two little girls (almost four and 2 years) I just wanted to tell you that it will get easier - I know you know this but sometimes it helps if someone else reminds you. My older daughter hated the carseat and pram when she was an infant. Good on you for venturing out in the car with both babies by yourself - before you know it they'll be arguing about which song they want playing (a little easier to manage I assure you!). Hang in there. And enjoy those moments when you're on your own - it helps to refuel! Congrats again.

Posted by: Living Down Under | Jul 11, 2010 4:35:38 PM

Well done for making it to the end of the day and that WELL deserved glass of vino! You are doing great!! It is going to get easier.
I LOVE your stories. You are a inspiration to all of us mamas out there.

Posted by: Kate | Jul 12, 2010 11:22:02 AM

aw, what a rough day :(
if it makes you feel any better, i'm pretty sure we all have them! at least i do. your story reminds me of when i took my two girls out for the first time alone. both screamed the whole time. i was sweating bullets the whole time trying not to lose it. here's to better days!!

Posted by: anne | Jul 13, 2010 8:14:27 PM

"this too shall pass."

i know you know better than any of us, that this is true! look at mads...she's gonna be 5 in a blink! & even with all the hurdles that can come with motherhood...you've done extraordinary! you're one of the best mothers i know, with one of the coolest liitle girls i know! ;)

Posted by: brandee | Jul 14, 2010 1:08:20 AM

Holy Cow! What a day! (And where the f. was Grandma? ;)

*I cried pretty much the whole way home the other day after visitng my parents. Mason ate *crazy* for breakfast or something and refused to get along with anyone. "Sybil? Can Mason come out to play?"

Posted by: Leanne | Jul 17, 2010 10:24:33 AM

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"Having a two-year-old is like having a blender that you don't have the top for." ~Jerry Seinfeld.

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